


This is y Hamilton can't have a smartphone.

by Melody_Howler



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Hamilton just tries to act young again, M/M, every thing i touch turnz to emo, it doesn't work, philip is still dating theo behind his dads back
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-04
Updated: 2017-05-28
Packaged: 2018-10-27 22:52:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10818423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melody_Howler/pseuds/Melody_Howler
Summary: Just a random text fic I'm gonna do while also trying to complete Hamilton Continued. I'm definitely not overworking myself.





	1. Phone: Hamilton's- Contact: John Laurens

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter One has Lams  
> YAY! The one fanfic that has it. i hope you're happy.

**March 18, 2017**

HamilHam: hey laurens, do you know how to take care of a teenager

Turtlez: yeah. why is angelica giving you problems again

HamilHam: nope, Philip. he has reached the angsty teen stage

Turtlez: oh god. welp, good luck with that, idk how to handle it

HamilHam: dude, your supposed to be the parent expert

Turtlez: Me! you're the one with like 8 kids. if anything you should be the parent expert.

HamilHam: touché  
HamilHam: but do u know anyone who knows how to handle this

Turtlez: maybe Jeffershit

HamilHam: definitely not

Turtlez: burr

HamilHam: nope, his kid hasn't reached that stage yet

Turtlez: welp, then im out of ideas

HamilHam: wow, some friend you are

Turtlez: i am offended  
Turtlez: thats it, i'm breaking up with you.

HamilHam: john no :o

Turtlez: you just friend zoned me then mocked said "friendship"

HamilHam: you'll always be my darling laurens, you lil' cinnabon

Turtlez: i love you

HamilHam: <3 u 2  
HamilHam: Omg i hope eliza doesn't see this.

Turtlez: i pray for your wellbeing 

 

**March 23, 2017**

Turtlez: hey alex  
Turtlez: alex?  
Turtlez: ya there  
Turtlez: Alexander!?!?!?  
Turtlez: if your playin some kind of sick prank, it isnt funny  
Turtlez: Alex, ur scaring me!  
Turtlez: I know you aren't busy. all your kids are at school and you said you didn't want to leave the house today because its ur day off.  
Turtlez: Imma call 911 if you don't pick up

_HamilHam changed his name to  ..._

Turtlez: alex?

...: Yes, dearest Laurens?

Turtlez: you arent alex

...: Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. You never know.

Turtlez: alex doesn't type like that

...: Alright, you got me, John Laurens.

Turtlez: how do you know my name

_... changed his name to HamilHam_

HamilHam: lol, i got ya gud

Turtlez: THAT WASN'T FUNNY!!

HamilHam: cmon, take a fucking joke

Turtlez: with a prank like that, are you sure your not going through an emo stage yourself

HamilHam: IT WAS A JOKE

Turtlez: stop trying to be young again. its not working

HamilHam: are you calling me old

Turtlez: maybe

HamilHam: Laurens! i am personally offended! you should be saying that to Jeffershit. hes way older than me

Turtlez: tru, tru.   
Turtlez: but you do act like an old man sometimes, ya know that

HamilHam: stfu

Turtlez: ok, ok. ttyl

HamilHam: see ya


	2. Phone: Madison- Contact: Thomas Jefferson

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a random fact about Jefferson's name: Garcon Francais means French boy in French.  
> well, he was always a Francophile, but at least we know he knows where France is.  
> (I'm not sorry)

**April 5, 2017**

J.Madison: Thomas, have you been alright lately? You've been giving Hamilton strange looks.

Garcon Francais: yeah, but i just noticed something bout him

J.Madison: What?

Garcon Francais: do you ever think he sometimes looks older than me, just a question

J.Madison: It might just be him stressing over the fact that he has 8 kids. If your triplets are already causing you to nearly pull your hair out, imaging having as many as him.

Garcon Francais: tru  
Garcon Francais: btw, i think ur name is 2 formal

J.Madison: What do you mean?

_Garcon Francais has changed your name to Lil' Jem_

Lil' Jem: Are you kidding me right now?!

Garcon Francais: lol. i love it. it suits u.  
Garcon Francais: ur smol and ur a little Jem

Lil' Jem: Did you just make a pun out of my name?

Garcon Francais: maybe 


	3. Group Chat: Tiny Rebels

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hell$ Lil' Angel- Angelica Hamilton  
> Pip pip- Philip  
> Tomboy of the Century- Theodosia

**May 18 2017**

Hell$ Lil' Angel: let me guess, you guys are going to try out for Romeo and Juliet

Pip pip: Nope  
Pip pip: We got in

Tomboy of the Century: we play the leading roles. I'd rather play one of the dudes, but Juliet works too

Hell$ Lil' Angel: welp, i ship it

Pip pip: Angel! No!

Hell$ Lil' Angel: Angel, yes

Tomboy of the Century: Angelica! WHYYYY!

Hell$ Lil' Angel: cause i can 

Pip pip: sis, why are you texting us while ur in school

Tomboy of the Century: dude, even Pip wouldn't do that

Hell$ Lil' Angel: well, this group chat is called Tiny Rebels for a reason

Tomboy of the Century: other than the fact that someone named it.

Pip pip: pretty legit reason, Theo

Hell$ Lil' Angel: oh shush theo

Pip pip: But it was legit

Tomboy of the Century: yeah, it was

Hell$ Lil' Angel: i could give less of a fuck how legit it was

Tomboy of the Century: Watch your profanity

Pip pip: is that even a relevant meme any more

Hell$ Lil' Angel: idk  
Hell$ Lil' Angel: but the real question is, would Dad ever know what a meme is

Pip pip: I thought you said you wouldn't make fun of Dads age anymore

Hell$ Lil' Angel: i never promised anything  
Hell$ Lil' Angel: oh shit, teach caught me

Pip pip: see ya

_Hell$ Lil' Angel has logged out of the chat_

Pip pip: Welp, guess its just u and me now, huh Theo

Tomboy of the Century: actually, Daddy just said I need to rehearse my lines for the play, so i gotta go

Pip pip: ok, well see ya

Tomboy of the Century: bye <3

Pip pip: <3


	4. Group Chat: Dads who need help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hunkules: Hercules  
> Patiently Waiting: Burr  
> Large French Fry: Lafayette

**May 20, 2017**

Hunkules: So, John told us yesterday that Philip has reached the forbidden stage

HamilHam: its been horrible.  
HamilHam: hes been listening to this band called Panic at the Disco and hasn't been coming out of his room for anything but school and dinner.

Patiently Waiting: well, i hope theo doesn't turn out like that

Large French Fry: i would hate to be you right now

Turtlez: I may have also called him old

Patiently Waiting: you what!!

Hunkules: DUUUUDDEE!!

Large French Fry: you, good sir, have made the worst mistake of you're life

Patiently Waiting: your, Laf, your

HamilHam: I gave him a good talking to on the phone, then i went and punched him in the gut to prove my point. 

Turtlez: it hurt, a lot

Patiently Waiting: well, he's always been strong compared to his short height

HamilHam: say i'm short again and you're next

Hunkules: oooohhhh burr's in trouble

Turtlez: You done messed up, A A Ron

Patiently Waiting: dont call me that

HamilHam: a a ron

Patiently Waiting: please stop

Hunkules: A A Ron

Large French Fry: A a Ron

Patiently Waiting: nooooooooooo  
Patiently Waiting: its senior year of college all over again!

Turtlez: ok, we'll stop

Patiently Waiting: thank you

Turtlez: A A Ron

_Patiently Waiting has left the chat_

HamilHam: yay, he's gone

Turtlez: yay

Hunkules: shit, william wants to watch Hercules wit me again  
Hunkules: I still have I can go the distance stuck in my head from the last 50 times

HamilHam: aww  
HamilHam: see ya

Turtlez: and Frances needs me

Large French Fry: and so does my kid

HamilHam: aww  
HamilHam: Bye guys 

Turtlez: bye

Large French Fry: au revoir


End file.
